I'm MELTING!!!!!!!!! MELTING!!!!!!!!

Muffins, I am one cranky ass b$#@! right now. I know we are supposed to be good Minnesotans who enjoy "celebrating the SEASONS" but nowhere in the original code of conduct presented to me in my childhood was I presented with the possibility that I would be residing in Serengeti Two!

This heat is for the birds and is a continual reminder of the film I saw last week with my dear friend Jonathon. We went to see Al Gore's film "The Inconvenient Truth" (about global warming). It is a well crafted piece that explores where we may be heading in terms of global catastrophe if we do not work quickly and efficiently to reduce emissions relating increased global temps. I am slightly concerned by the trend and yet I believe that there are many things that we will not understand about meteorological fickleness due to the absence of any longitudinal data older that some of my friends (Moisha Lipshitz) supporting the claims that we are doomed.

What I can say with some level of assuredness is that I am parched and always damp in this current wave of extreme temps. I truly feel like the wicked witch of the Midwest these days. I wake up sweaty and not because I have had the right attention paid to me overnight. ;)

I weather like this I have realized the following:
I am more prone to road rage.
I will go to a movie even if it doesn't really sound that inspiring (just to be in a refrigerator for a few hours).
I like to hang out in the freezer section of Cub Foods.
I examine the perspiration stains of others to see if I am sweating more or less than my peers.
I chant the mantra of the Red Ribbon Riders and Crew "Drink and Pee"

and

I find no relief!

Today I will be spending the day at Valley Fair in support of the PrideAlive annual Gay Day at Valley Fair event. The only good to come of this heat wave is that the park should be full of cute boys going shirtless!

I only have one thing on my mind right now though... The words of Rhoda Morgenstern in her opening monologue of the television show bearing her name...
"so I moved to Minneapolis - where it's cold and I figured I'll keep better"!

What the Hell Happened here. That was a short 3 decades ago (give or take).

Maybe we should all seriously take a look at what Mr. Gore has to say and take every opportunity to craft some changes to reverse this climate trend change.

I don't know about you but I would like to think that when I am old enough to sit on a rocker on a porch some day I can do so with a nice frosty drink in my hand. If the current trend continues we may be looking seriously at having to seriously "Chill Out".

That's all for now muffins... Keep cool and wear your sunblock!